Welcome To The Loony Bin!
by TigonRising
Summary: All of Hogwarts is on edge. Waiting for the next thing to happen, the last thing on the students' minds is learning. So, the teachers' appoint the only one who seems to be not bothered by it all, Luna Lovegood, to help counsel her fellow students. When, all the while, the very next thing has already happened and more is soon to occur.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

I know many people, don't read these, or at the very least, like me, skim them, but here is a few quick things I personally think you should know before reading this.

**1:** I am more acquainted with the movies than the books.

**2:** I merely perused the first book, cut my eye at the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and read all of seventh in a "how does it end," binge. So if anyone is out of character or strange it is merely from ignorance's sake. Also, I am trying to find a writing style to remedy this handicap of sorts so that is probably why it is written this way.

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**Chapter 1: _Something in the Air_**

The hissing had become a familiar sound inside and around Hogwarts, slipping between nooks and crannies and any crack the wind could blow through. Outside on the grounds, amongst the trees and bushes, it was everywhere, carried by wind, tangling itself in leaves, and slithering across green rippling blades of grass which folded and swayed as if a hidden creature were prowling within them. There was no escaping or ignoring the sound. By its very pattern and rhythm it could not quite have been parcel tongue or anything remotely Slytherin -like to remind anyone of He-Who-Must-Not-Be Named. However, the tone still carried a weight of danger, and the most troubling part about this was its commonality.

The older adults of Hogwarts continued to go through their normal routines with deadly accuracy. Gliding through halls and in-between students nearly as easily as the ghosts who usually haunted them, their robes sashayed and swept at the floors. The long flowing fabrics were lapping the lingering dirt and dust, those who had cleaned before, left behind or overlooked, like an unnoticed hitch hiking parasite. Their heads were to be held up in normal position or higher. There was not be a head so low it would seem bowed or worried at least not in front of the students. There was to be no alteration in mood, personality, or conversation. After all, the oldest adults, the teachers were to be the second example of sturdiness alongside the building itself. They were to be the protectors, the sanctuary to which the young and troubled would look to for comfort and so they had to hide their human nature and become stone.

Various eyes were always watching, switching from one direction, one person, object, to another. Some were innocent and noticeable. Others were deliberate and stealthily hidden. Everyone was watching everyone, who watched everyone. A companion to these eyes was the lips which parted hesitantly and methodically. Sometimes hanging apart and other times not parting at all. It was common for them to be hidden behind a hand, book, or to be seen nestled up beside an ear.

The hallways nowadays were not filled with loud incoherent chatter, laughter, and the occasional crying. Instead, it was as if all the noise to be made tried to nestle up close to the ground, but sometimes accidentally floated away like a balloon. The noise had altered and twisted itself into the hissing whispers which struck playfully at the ears with rattling tails. Professor McGonagall and the others felt the sting long after they had left the noise behind, and still it lingered, nagging at the back of their minds.

"Something must be done," many of them thought, and when knowing they were truly alone amongst themselves, uttered to each other frequently, but although they continued to ritualistically speak these words, almost chant, nothing ever became of them. Until one day…

They finally realized their solution, remedy, had been right under their noses all along.

It floated amongst the crowd, as pale as an apparition, disappearing, and reappearing. If one did not look carefully they would have thought it was a trick of the eye. A trail of long blond hair caught up in the pale body's fluid movement, flew back into the air, tumbling and crashing in the winds of some other space in time. With head tilted up ever so slightly those large ethereal eyes stared nearly unblinkingly into another realm.

How could they have missed this for so long! The strange anomaly formally known as Luna Lovegood, or, in student slang terms, Loony Lovegood. There was something naturally different about her, yes, but she had to be the cure. After all, out of everyone, she seemed to be the most unaffected. Her very presence when noticed was so out of place inside the crowds, one had to wonder whether they were lucidly dreaming.

Now that they had something of a solution, the trouble would be to implement it. Although, the real question amongst the coven of teachers was who would initiate it. There was another great pause which held fast for many weeks until ruffled up and frustrated McGonagall took it upon herself to grace the headmaster with her presence.

Headmaster Dumbledore sat behind his desk, with a lemon drop between his fingers, intently examining the small round ball as a clock maker, or diamond cutter would. It was as if he had nothing to do at all. It was as if he had been specifically waiting for her to appear.

"Headmaster…" she said, after stopping right in front of his desk, hands clasped together politely in front of her, eyes steadily calm and patient, but face cracking to reveal worry and question. The headmaster's eyes looked passed the lemon drop from behind his half moon glasses and smiled. Sitting up straight he continued to beam unguardedly.

"Yes, Professor McGonagall."

He stared at her for a while and, as if remembering the treat inside his hand, popped it into his mouth. He looked back at her like a child who realized the teacher had been watching him the whole time.

"My colleges and I… feel like we can no longer continue to go on like this…" she averted her eyes down to the side after holding down a stare with him. Eventually, they found their way to her clasped hands which had grown tighter and slightly pink.

"The atmosphere in the air is terrible," she turned her body sideways and before she knew it, she was pacing back and forth in front of him, "the students are not learning as well as they should because their distracted."

"Distracted?" interjected the headmaster.

She stopped.

"Yes," she started to pace again.

"All these rumors and events are taking their minds away from learning, and their troubles are starting to distract us!" she said exasperatedly, folding an arm with the other holding up her chin. Eyes lowered, head bowed, she folded in her bottom lip and bit it.

"And what do you suppose we do professor?" he asked, so innocently it was as if it were coming from one of her students. She barely contained a jump from the strange chill fingered down her spine.

The words were in her head, throat, and on her tongue, but when she tried opening her mouth. Nothing. She closed it again, eyes slowly inching over toward the headmaster who sat comfortably back in his chair, arms folded in his lap. From the corners she saw his white bushy brows rise, glassy beady eyes shining.

"I-we noticed that Ms. Lovegood is well…different…" she sucked in her lips and frowned knowing her words were not coming out very politely and could be misconstrued as rude.

He smiled, tilting his head sideways and looking away from her. "Yes. Indeed, Ms. Lovegood seems to be very different, very different and bright. She is a great rare treasure to our school."

She stopped pacing again.

"Yes, she is," she nodded, eyes slowly moving from side to side as if she were reading the words in her mind.

"-And that's why we think she can help change the atmosphere."

She turned around swiftly, back rigid, head rising up high in a stance many of her students knew very well.

"The others and I thought maybe some of the students could use a little counseling of sorts since the balls and festivals don't seem to be working anymore."

"-and the counseling will be done by?"

Her eyes went down to the floor. Her sandpaper aged cheeks tinted a rosy pink, "well I had more reasonable ideas but Professor Sprout and the others thought she would be the perfect fit."

She looked up.

"Hmm…" his serious face gently calmed and he spread a smile. "That is a wonderful idea."

McGonagall smiled, "that's exactly what they said."

"She is a nice calm person to be around and her mind is- it would a great change of thought for everyone."

"So-"

"Yes," said Dumbledore smiling. He produced a lemon drop and examined it as he did the one before, repeating his motion of looking past it and at her.

"Would you like one?"

She stared before blinking and shaking her head. "No sir, thank you."

Quickly she turned away, robes billowing and sashaying, pointy hat erectly describing her mood. She smiled happily. Her last resort had worked. She was so bubbled up with excitement she did not think much of the beady eyes lingering on her from behind as she left.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk" went the person in the painting who had suddenly returned.

"You could have _exposed_ me," said the man who appeared to be Dumbledore, rolling the lemon drop between his fingers.

"And you could have _ruined_ me," said the painting.

The "headmaster" smiled, leaning back and popping the lemon drop into his mouth. He closed his eyes. Tongue rolling and tossing the hard candy about. He hummed and sighed, sinking into his chair, letting the sour sweetness rush over him.

"I've decided to wait it out," said the painting. "They'll eventually find out."

The Dumble-Not, with his eyes closed, sighed, folding his arms into his lap, and propping his feet onto the desk. "Then you will be waiting **_forever_**."


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note****: **I don't know if I made this clear, and I probably didn't, but I'm challenging myself to write something each day when I'm not editing my book. So here is the second chapter of this fun project. :) I think the first chapter is always the easiest, but here's the second. Also I had no plan beyond the premise so we shall both see how it turns out.

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**Chapter 2: _We Need Counseling From Whom?_**

The next phase of the plan was going to run smoother than all the rest. Professor McGonagall was sure of this because it had already been decided that she would be the one to approach Ms. Lovegood. Now the only question was how to complete such a task?

She decided to gently ease the subject upon the girl. After all, she didn't want to frighten her with what could be considered an enormous job. No. Instead, she would take it slow. All things were better when time was patiently taken, like a good flavorful stew or tender steak. Her stomach growled.

Her eyes glued to the girl at her desk. She looked so small and fragile amongst her other peers with an aura that could repel and attract. The fact that Ms. Lovegood did not seem to notice her stare made her think of a pure white bunny, innocent and sweet, and staring at her without her knowing made McGonagall feel like a fox or some other sort of predator. But she knew better. If anything, she was a cat, and from what she knew, cats didn't much bother with rabbits.

While the students went about trying to do what she had already asked of them, she balanced the lesson on one side of her brain and the mission on another, and while doing so she failed to realize a most grievous mistake. Luna Lovegood was not like other creatures. She did not need an elaborate rouse to be coaxed. But her uniqueness slipped McGonagall's mind completely, and so she lumped her in with the rest of her students, and wasted so much valuable time in thought, it was only on the 5th "PROFESSOR MCGONAGOLL!" from her students did she realize Ms. Lovegood's eyes were locked on her.

The girl's lips faintly held a hint of smile. She quickly scanned the room as if counting all their heads. Why were their robes black again? Black was such a depressing color. She sucked in a breath and sighed.

"I'm sorry students," she shook her head, "where was I?"

"You were-" said Ginny.

"-**_Professor_**!" said a girl named Suzanna loudly, arm thrown up into the air with a snooty know-it-all look, "class should have been dismissed by **_now_**!"

"Oh" she put a hand to her cheek, eyes looking downward.

"Are you feeling alright professor?" asked Ginny, brows furrowed.

All the sound in the air was sucked out and held by the student's breaths. After the creaking and popping of a few fidgeting bodies, steadily the horrible whispers began to rise up. She quickly looked up.

"Maybe she's getting that Muggle disease called _'old timers'_," someone whispered.

A giggle blossomed amongst the middle row to the left. She quickly looked at them.

"And what is so funny?"

The giggles ran to hide in the silence and their smiles dropped from their faces. Oh how she missed both once they left.

Ginny raised her hand.

"Yes, Ms. Weasly?"

"Professor McGonagall, I believe it's dinner time now" she said, easing her hand down.

She looked at the clock. "Oh yes. You're quite right. Class dismissed."

Everyone hurriedly uprooted themselves from their desks and poured out into the hall at great speed. When professor McGonagall finally gazed down at their desks she saw some did not even bother to put away their things. Staring and nodding she made a mental note of where she believed these certain students sat and continued up toward a Ms. Lovegood who had just finished packing and had finally stood up. Right when she had swung around professor McGonagall was right beside her, blocking her leaving.

There was no look of worry or concern on the girl's face. With a faint smile she looked up into the professor's eyes.

"Hello Professor," she said.

McGonagall stared at the girl for a moment before remembering to smile and placed her arms in front with hands clasping each other, in what could be seen in a sweet girlish sort of way, though given her age, a sweet old lady.

"Hello Ms. Lovegood," she opened her mouth, "I-hmm…"

She had to break eye contact, placing them anywhere but those nearly unblinking eyes that seemed to try to pull hidden things out her brain.

"Yes Professor," she said, but when the professor did not speak, "professor, I believe nargles might be trying to fog up your brain."

If she were any other teacher who did not know Luna, or was as irritable as Snape, she would have thought the girl were being disrespectful, but since she really did seem concerned she merely just closed her shocked mouth, returned her eyes to normal and gave a shaky laugh. "Ah, yes-no, Ms. Lovegood, I am fine I-"

"You know if you want to get rid of them, a good way to start is to hang upside down," she said, "They don't like being upside down."

"Hmm" professor McGonagall turned in her lips. "Why thank you for the tip, but I do have something I would like to speak to you about."

Luna's lips parted ever so slightly, so minutely, if professor McGonagall wasn't paying so close attention to her she would have never spotted it. When Luna did not say anything the professor closed her eyes, breathed in, and then sighed, opening them.

"Ms. Lovegood, it has come to the other professors and my attention that you seem to be doing quite well."

Luna simply blinked.

"And well you see," she rubbed her hands together , eyes roving around but still spotting the girl's, "your peers and others appear to not have the same…ability as you, so on behalf of the school… we would like you to counsel some of them," she said slowly, looking straight into her eyes once again.

"Of course it may sound like a lot, but it won't take up most of your spare time," she paused.

Luna blinked.

"And if necessary we can make a few exceptions on the days when you're not free. So…" she smiled wide, "how does that sound?"

Luna blinked again. The faint smile on her face gently grew wider. "That sounds nice, but how does one counsel others?"

She tilted her head to the side.

"Well," the professor smiled nervously, "we'll set up a designated area for you to be and have students' sign up for appointments with you."

"And whatever should we talk about?"

"Their problems of course."

"But how does that help?"

"The students simply need someone to talk to about their problems, and as you just showed you have great solutions."

She stared.

"Upside down? The nargles?"

"Oh yes!" her smile grew wider, "I'm sure I can help everyone deal with those pesky beasts roaming about. Actually, I have noticed the vespers in the air."

"Vespers?"

"Yes, they're creatures' that hide in smoke. You inhale their sent and it can make you sad, depressed, or mad. Very extreme feelings."

"Ah," the professor clapped her hands together, "I see. Well," the professor turned to go get her things. "Luna I thank you for accepting to help us. Both I, the teachers, and even the headmaster, appreciate it."

Luna stood in place following the professor with her eyes.

"Speaking of headmaster Dumbledore do you think he should come see me too?"

McGonagall immediately looked up and smiled, "and why do you say that?"

"Because I believe there's a creature bothering him too, but" she frowned, "I'm not exactly sure what it is."

McGonagall laughed passing up by Luna. "Perhaps it's nargles too? Or what was it one time sneezles?

Luna frowned in thought, following behind the teacher. When the professor saw this she said, "don't worry Luna. The headmaster will be just fine. Now let's go enjoy ourselves and eat."

The professor's stomach let out a terrible growl. "Oh! Um... Excuse me."

They had entered a silent hall just outside the two double doors which used to leak out many muffled sounds.

"Yes," said Luna, she looked over at McGonagall, "but if he does not please send him to me."

The professor gave a genuine smile. "Thank you, Luna."

Opening the wide double doors most eyes gravitated towards them. McGonagall strode in first with head up and eyes above. Luna trailed behind before drifting off toward the Ravenclaw table when she heard a, "LUNA!" and saw Ginny Weasly waving her arm about. She smiled walking over toward her table.

"Hello Ginny."

Ginny's mouth churned with food which she quickly chewed and swallowed. "Hey, what took you so long?"

"The professor wanted to talk to me," said Luna, starting to fill her plate with food. Those at the table who were a little curious cut their eye over at the two every so often or perked up their ears. The same went for those at any table who had been in their class.

"Why?" asked Ginny revealing a mouth full of dissolving potpie.

"Because they've realized everyone is being terrorized by rare magical creatures and so she wants me to help them."

What was left of the food fell out of Ginny's mouth.

"EW! GROSS **_GINVERA_**!" yelled a boy beside her.

Smiles slipped onto faces, giggles, and laughter bubbled up, and the whispers began.

"Are you serious!" some shouted.

"YES!" shouted a girl.

The great hall became a buzz in nearly no time at all. Heads turned to every person beside them and the hissing filled the air. The teacher's who sat at their own table with the headmaster watched it begin like wild fire, except professor McGonagall, who after having settled in her seat, fixed her plate with fluffy mashed potatoes with gravy, peas, and Salisbury steak. Scooping up the potatoes she brought them to her mouth and ate.

"Mmm" she closed her eyes, barely containing her delight.

"It would seem that there will be no need for an _announcement_," said Snape dryly, slowly twirling his fork about. He looked over at McGonagall whose mouth was full of potatoes. She stared at him and then looked out at the sea of students who seemed to have grown restless.

"Is that true?" asked a girl at the Hufflepuff table.

"Of course it's not true!" replied another from Slytherin causing a burst of laughter around her.

"She said it herself!" yelled an older boy from Gryffindor, getting up.

"Oh sit down Jonathan!" cried another boy beside him.

Jonathan turned to the teacher's table. "HEADMASTER IS THAT TRUE!"

The headmaster who sat comfortably and snuggly in the middle looked at the boy with an expressionless face. Jonathan, who could not hold down a stare with the man, looked down and slowly eased himself back into his seat causing a few more giggles and laughter as a result.

The headmaster wiped his mouth with a napkin, gave a grunt which could have possibly been a cough then stood up. All grew silent and in the quiet he spoke.

"Yes. It is true that very soon," he gazed across the great hall, "a place will be set up for those of you with any problems to have someone to speak to about them."

The eyes of the students switched about like cartoonish thieves.

"Besides something terribly serious, it is going to be advised that each student visit Ms. Lovegood at least _once_."

A well of snickering erupted amongst a few groups of boys. Everyone else simply stared up at the headmaster with wide open mouths and bulging eyes as if he had grown two heads. The headmaster gave everyone a jolly smile and especially locked eyes with a certain girl herself.

However, Luna did not smile back because her mind began to drift to the man's beady eyes and tried desperately to see what was behind them. They lingered upon her.

"That is all. Enjoy your meals."

Low whispers and laughter took the silence's place. He sat down in his chair and settled back to eating. As he tore into his chicken he continued to eye the girl who, although had turned around like all the others, could still feel his stare upon her.

There must have been a chill in the air. It prickled up her skin. "He will **_definitely_ **need to visit me" she thought, tearing into her sandwich.

"Well that went _well_," said Snape, smirking in-between a grimace at McGonagall before looking at the headmaster.

"I think it went rather well **_indeed_**," said the headmaster, looking at Snape and then at McGonagall.

Throughout the time she was there, McGonagall, could feel his stare and stealthily cut her eye at him every so often. Of course, he noticed this and smiled innocently. There was a glimmer of doubt in the back of her mind which made her wonder if Luna had been right, but then she remembered she was just worrying too much and shook her head.

"Hang upside down?" she thought, holding back a laugh and smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

So far, I think I'm pretty on track with the challenge! :3 And on information actually important, this chapter has turned out a little more risque than expected so this is just heads up.

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**Chapter 3: _The Loony Bin_**

If Luna were truly being honest, she would admit that she was happier than she had ever been these days because she was feeling rather important. Unlike before professor McGonagall had come to her, when she felt like air and nobody ever noticed her, though she tended not to dwell on such sensitive matters. Even she was prone to lying to herself, since lying always seemed to numb the pain. And besides, she could not worry about herself. Her job now was to help others in need.

From the very moment she woke up, her movements were calculated and precise. She could not dillydally. Looking under her pillow for Mimzies and under the bed for Tattleboos, she made it, and went straight away to getting ready.

Those rooming with her, tuned in, every so often, with a touch of curiosity. The girl had done weird things before but the way she carried herself now was apparently very different. Instead of wandering absent mindedly about and dreamily, she held her head up high, eyes fixed, and alert.

"Are you alright Luna?" asked a thick voluptuous girl named Salome, she lye sprawled across her made up bed with a magazine beside her, still in her skimpy night clothing because she was very proud of her body.

The other girls might as well have said this. Their eyes asked what their mouths did not.

Luna stopped undressing herself near the dresser and turned to Salome. "Yes" she said, barely controlling her smile.

She slipped on a favorite fuzzy blue shirt, black shorts, and long rainbow socks and worn sneakers. She put her leprechaun gold coins necklace around her neck for good luck, pulled her hair into a pony tail, and then put on pretty pink cat eye glasses. "Because," she thought seeing them in the shop, "glasses make you look smart and trustworthy."

She smiled looking in the mirror at herself. She twisted from one side to another tugging at her clothes, and adjusting her glasses. The giggles and whispers in the background were muted by her ears.

"Oh Luna," said a girl named Adelaide with strawberry blond hair. She came up behind her, "don't you look lovely."

The other girls' bubbly giggles followed after. "Why thank you," she said, which made more of them.

"No really!" said Ida, "tell her what you really said!"

She laughed so hard she fell over onto Margo's bed and curled over. Luna's eyes switched from each one of them.

"What did she say?" Luna asked innocently and sweetly.

"Oh Luna! You don't want to know," said Margo in mock graveness.

"That you look like a clown," said Ida in-between breathing. She looked at her for a few moments before bursting into laughter again.

Luna simply stood there, confused, sad, and a little mad. She looked at both of them once more before turning to Adelaide. "Oh Luna! What I meant, was you need _help_."

"I need help?" asked Luna.

"In more ways than one," muttered Margo. Ida shook uncontrollably.

"Yes, in the dressing department that is," Adelaide pulled up a piece of the fuzzy sweater and wrinkled up her nose.

"Addi's right love," said Salome, "it looks like you've skinned a beloved cartoon monster."

Luna looked down at her clothes, "oh."

She looked up at Salome.

"I'm guessing it's your first day of counseling," said Adelaide picking up some of Luna's hair in her hand.

Ida fell back on the bed and shook as if having a spasm, "You're killing me!"

"Yes," said Luna looking from Adelaide to Ida.

"Hmm, that's what I thought," she stopped stroking Luna's hair.

"I think I can help you look more professional, presentable."

Her amber eyes stared into Luna's.

"How?" asked Luna.

"_How dare you question the fashion guru_?" said Salome, removing herself from the bed and twisting over toward the two. Not soon after Margo and Ida made their way over until Luna was surrounded by the girls and in front the mirror.

They giggled and laughed like little devilish imps as they threw open drawers, pulling things out and throwing things in. In barely a blink of an eye Luna found herself being undressed and dressed again, almost like a doll. Her mouth was slow to move. Sometimes it would open, but eventually shut itself again. Her thoughts were slow and so were her words so they got lost amongst the speed. An arm pulled up by Adelaide, a leg spread by Margo, lifted by Ida, and bra clipped by Salome.

When they were done they stepped back revealing the mirror again. Luna stood rigid. None of the clothes were her own. The shirt was tight and low cut and even while paired with a blazer was still very revealing, no thanks to the padded push up bra also given to her by Ida who coincidentally happened to be around the same size as her. Her breasts sat up and tipped out like two white round snowy hills. The skirt given to her was pleated and so short she feared if she bent over it would reveal the red tiny lace underwear underneath.

She shivered slightly as the air moved across her chest, and up her skirt tickling her exposed backside's cheeks. Her legs were ironically covered up high in warm black stockings and her shoes were the fancy patent kind, begrudgingly borrowed from Ida. She realized her cheeks had grown quite red.

"Now what about her hair," said Salome.

"What about her face?" asked Ida, giggling.

Adelaide stood, fingers rapping against her chin. "Hmm…No, her hair's fine. It's got that sexy librarian look. But-"

Immediately, she grabbed Luna tightly by the jaw and chin, puffing up her face. She turned it one way and then another, "hmm, yeah, you're right."

She leaned in close to Luna's face examining each section. All the while Luna stared with a hint of innocence but a touch of worry.

"Ida, bring me my _magic_."

Ida jumping up and down ran over toward Adelaide's side of the room before bringing over a large designer box.

"Thank you, love," she said, turning to open the box revealing a wide array of creamy and powdery concoctions in many different colors.

"This," she said, as she stuck a finger in and pulled it out with a glob of dangerous-red substance which shined like a fresh drop of blood, "is a special kit. Not your ordinary muggle stuff no. This is made from the best magical plants and creatures."

Adelaide's finger started to swipe across Luna's lips, "Magi-"

Adelaide's finger popped straight into her mouth as well as the goo. The girls' gasped. Quickly, Adelaide removed her finger saying very strictly, "don't speak!"

Luna shut her mouth, tasting the leftover flavor which reminded her of strawberry and raspberry jam, something hot, and blood. She rolled it around on her tongue and decided she did not like the flavor. Adelaide continued to swipe and pat at her lips then told her to rub them together which she did. Her cheeks were dusted with powder, her eye lids smeared with a hazy dark blue, black thick lines were drawn around her eyes, and a terrible cylindrical devise was put near them to curl her lashes.

When she was done Adelaide sighed, "Aahhh, done!"

She cleaned her hands, packed up her stuff, and walked over toward her bed. The others went to sit down as well. Luna turned around to look at them.

"Am I ready now," she said.

Adelaide fell back onto her bed, "yes!"

She gave her a thumb up. The other girls sighed as if they were exhausted as well.

Luna looked at the clock and realized she was going to be late for her first appointment. She swiped up the glasses they had taken off and flew straight toward and out the door.

On classless days the halls were not as crowded and a little quieter making conversations and noises sharper and clearer. The shoes on her feet clicked smartly, echoing loudly as if to make sure people knew "they" were coming. The room she would be counseling in was made just for her. She smiled thinking about how she watched the headmaster master make it himself. It had a blue door with puffy white clouds and it said, "Guidance."

Beyond the blue door was a small, square room with a desk, chair, and on the opposite side, a comfy seat for her clients. There were a few bookcases too filled with books the headmaster said may come in handy and to use.

After its grand opening, the headmaster had taken her into the room for a private conversation. He told her, "Ms. Lovegood," as he sat in what would be her clients' seat, while she sat behind the desk. She thought it odd, but felt it also funny that she appeared as the authority figure, but of course it was most very clear who it really was.

He smiled at her and they both simply looked at each other for a very long time until he said, "As you know, before you can start counseling the students we must make sure that whatever is divulged to you in this room cannot be uttered to anyone else. If you would, please come here."

Luna got up from her seat and did as she was told. The headmaster stood up and brandished his wand.

"Please open your mouth and hold out your tongue" he said, as a doctor would. She did and he then twirled his wand above her tongue. Luna felt a tickling sensation as if someone were actually writing on it and she smiled though her face hurt and she wanted to close her mouth.

In remembrance of that day, she stuck her tongue out, wriggling it about before sucking it back in like a noodle taking with it the sticky goo and horrible taste.

"Can you believe this!" she heard someone shout from around the corner. Her shoes were very loud. She sped up passing the hallway, but listening all the while. Snickers trailed behind the question.

"Too bad. **_You_ **signed up."

"But not by **_choice_**," hissed the voice from previously before, which sounded very familiar to her. "Apparently Snape thought it would be funny if this was my punishment."

The laughter came again. "Oh shut it you two fat blokes!"

"I have enough problems as it is already!"

There was a pause. "I guess that's why he wants you to **_go_**!"

The two other's laughter could be heard again.

Luna who had stopped, standing close by the wall, smiled while fingering her leprechaun coins necklace. She closed her eyes, breathed in quietly, and out slowly, then hurried toward her new room.

Draco Malfoy gave Crabbe and Goyle a dirty look before tearing down the hall and around the corner toward his unwanted destination. When at last he stood in front of the door, he sneered, wrinkling up his noise at the cutesy sky image, supposedly trying to be whimsical. He, like many other students saw the door and room being made.

Of course, he didn't like the old fool to begin with and thought this was just even more reason to believe the headmaster was going senile, which also made him wonder why the plan for him to kill the man had been postponed. Not that he cared either way. He huffed, taking a deep breath and turning the door knob. When he opened the door he looked back to see if anyone was out in the hall watching and then he quickly shut it behind him.

"Hello, Draco."

Spinning around quickly he saw a woman-no girl. A very hot scantily dressed girl get up from the chair behind the desk and walk out in front of it. He moved closer toward her, frowning as he tried to figure out why her voice sounded eerily familiar.

Luna thought he looked sort of confused or lost. His hair was mussed up, there were bags under his eyes, and he was pale.

"He does not look good," she thought, "he does not look good at all!"

"_Draco_," she said again, in a way which could either sound like concern or purring. Draco thought the latter. He squinted even more. It felt as if he was drunk or dreaming. Yes, it must be either or both. He slowly went forward stepping around the couch to stand in front of her. She was shorter than him, he realized.

"Sit down, Draco," she said.

So caught up in thought he simply did as told without any quips or objections. Luna was rather surprised by this but did not comment on it. She liked it.

"Now tell me, Draco. What is bothering you?"

He sat there staring up at her in the chair, laid back, simply staring.

"It must be worse than I thought," she thought. "Hmm, could he have a terrible infestation of nargles, or maybe vespers, or maybe nargles and verspers, or something else **entirely**? This is harder than I thought…" she frowned.

She stepped closer to him, nearly bumping her knees against his, and leaned in forward. At first looking into her face, his eyes fell down to the wonderfully displayed cleavage in front of him. The breasts he calculated were around the small medium size, either way all good to fondle. When he looked back up his eyes lingered at her half parted red slick lips then at her nose then up to her eyes. She had taken off her glasses.

If he didn't know any better he would have sworn he was looking at _Loony Lovegood_…_**WHAT WAS HE SAYING! OF COURSE HE WAS LOOKING AT LOONY** **LOVEGOOD!**_ His eyes grew wide making him appear even madder with his disheveled appearance.

"_Draco,_ are you there," she said, her face very, very, close to his.

Her big eyes stared straight into his. She seemed to only lean in further when he wouldn't reply until suddenly she fell forward, falling straight onto him. Her legs spread apart, skirt flew up on her backside, and her chest rested against his with her head in the crook of his shoulder.

His lips trembled as if from the cold and his body went rigid. The heat he was already feeling intensified. He felt excited, disgusted, and confused.

"_L-l-l-loo-Love…good_," he stuttered, eyes wide as he stared at the side of the girl's head. She brought her hands to his shoulders and pushed herself up, unfortunately flicking back her hair which could have been misconstrued as being a sexy hair toss.

"_Lovegood_?" Draco's voice seemed to crack.

His hands found their way to her hips as she sat on his lap. He looked down from her face all the way to her skirt, where he could feel the actual contours of her bottom's cheeks.

"**Yes**, Draco. I'm here to help you," she said.

He closed his eyes and blinked. "Is this some sort of **_trick_**?"

He turned his head this way and that. Luna frowned in confusion.

"_**IT'S NOT FUNNY**_!" he shouted, breathing in and out quickly, eyes wild and darting about, until they softened seeing her face.

She held his shoulders tightly.

"_Draco_, I am here to help you" she said. "_Please_ tell me your problems…"

He stared her in the eyes for a very long time before using a bit of his strength to push her onto his chest, wrapping his arms around her in an awkward hug, like a child holding their teddy bear. His body seemed to relax, shoulders slumping as he held her in his arms.

Luna gasped, but kept her lips closed when he started to speak.

"_If I am dreaming… than it's okay, right_?"

"_Yes_" she silently mouthed where he couldn't see. At least she wasn't exactly lying.

Breathing in, then out, he began to speak.


End file.
